In order to define the school's true identity, according to administrators, many of Lakeside's emblems and insignia will be revised. The changes include the modification of the school crest (see illustration) and the replacement of the cross on McKay Chapel with a brass "Start" logo. In addition, the mission statement will now simply read, "Lakeside School: Where do you want to go today?"
"For years, Lakeside School has been an aimless wanderer, ambling about as though in a haze," said Head of School Terry Macaluso, using sweeping arm gestures. "These changes, external though they be, are but the visible manifestations of a new vision, one that is based on the only thing on which we can really count in this ever-changing world."
As these changes come in the wake of a massive, $46 million fundraising campaign--to which Bill Gates, head of Microsoft, is a major contributor--many are asking whether Lakeside has been unduly influenced by moneyed interests.
"Well, now it's more like $80 million," said Macaluso, who giggled with glee and high-fived communications director Jane C. Williams.
"Of course we haven't 'sold out,' " snapped Upper School Director George Herland. He then abruptly ended the interview in order to play Flight Simulator on his new Pentium laptop computer.
Many students feel slighted by Lakeside's apparent adoption of corporate guidance. "I think it's ridiculous that the school, pretending to be unbiased and nonsectarian, forbids religious groups, and then turns around and puts these company logos all over the place," remarks one student.
"That argument is completely invalid," said Dean of Studies Jack McHenry. "You see, religious orientation is something that one determines through choice. One chooses to be Christian, one chooses to be Muslim. Using Microsoft products, however, is not a choice--it's a necessity."
"Amen," responded Dean of Students Elaine Christensen.