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IN THIS ISSUE

• Verda Cook writes about their new home
• The editor has new wheels
• Bill McNair and Verda write letters
• Barbara Wear forwards an obit written for the SUV
• Jack Peaker sends some quotes from the long-lived Bob Hope
• Don Henderson´s story is about a case of over-population
• Bill McNair and Tom Telfer recommend websites

Verda Cook, who recently moved with her husband, Stanley, from the garden they had tended for so many years, writes about their new home in Kitchener, Ontario:

THE COUNTRY DWELLERS BECOME CITY DWELLERS

Our Building, in the distance

The building we live in is concrete and brick. Repair work on the building has been ongoing for the past four months and the residents have become tired of the inconvenience. However, without the repairs on the bricks, the building would deteriorate. Kudos to the management for taking action.

The building is only 20 years old, but one of those built in the early years when contractors discovered they could continue to work through the winter by using salt in the mortar. The amount of salt and mortar in a balanced proportion was not defined in those early years and I recall my Aunt (who was one of the first owners of a unit in this building) remarking that someday they would need to replace bricks because of the salt residue seen on the outside of the building. She was right.

We hear the noise of the hammers, but it is very muffled. Traffic noise we do not hear, nor do we hear any noise from any other units in the building. People come and go in the hallways and we do not hear them. Occasionally a group might stand near our door and have a jolly conversation with laughter, and we may hear a little of that.

We have been taking daily walks in the gardens. I admire the flowers, the designs, and the beauty of the place. To date I have had no ambition to join the staff while they are on their knees planting. Nor have I had the urge to pull a weed or two which I see in the beds. I think I burned out on our 3 1/2 acre property. Will take it easy until next year, then I´ll see if I have an urge!

One portion of the gardens in Kitchener

While walking through the gardens, I sometimes think I am back in Vancouver. There are great specimens of Douglas Fir, which I relate to the West Coast and not this region. Flower beds have fuschia trees and flowering maple trees, but these are in pots sunk into the bed. The magnolias, dogwoods, redbuds, almonds, and golden chain tree make spectacular displays.

Must run. Have a busy day ahead. It seems to be never-ending at the moment, but we do have time to sit on the balcony at night and believe, it or not, we do see the stars. I was amazed, as I recall not being able to see stars when we lived in the city many years ago.

Because Kate Brookfield is on a month-long visit to Canada from Taiwan, and because Verda´s story is short, I have decided to tell you about my new wheels:

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

Having given up driving my car last spring, I have been relying on taxis for transportation. I have saved enough money through not owning a car, especially now that gas prices have gone so high, that I can afford to take taxis once or twice a week. I have curtailed my travelling, now that I no longer drive 40 miles to Abbotsford twice a week to visit my sister, and have limited my shopping to my immediate neighbourhood. I do go to George Derby Centre once a week to do the banking for the Volunteer Society, and that is in Burnaby, the next city north, and for that, I take a taxi. My long-suffering co-ordinator, Marilyn Magid, usually drives me home, and we manage to have lunch en route most Tuesdays.

All was under control until recently, when I have found it progressively harder to walk, because of arthritis and thinning discs in my backbone. I found I was making excuses for not walking over a few blocks because I was exhausted after such short jaunts, and I jested that I was going to get a scooter and join the other seniors who zip around our part of town.

I made the mistake of repeating my determination to become the terror of the sidewalks to Jay, who took it seriously. He researched scooters on the net, and found there is a business in a neighbouring city which handles only scooters. He insisted that we go to see them, and helped me kick tires and try out a light model that seemed to fill all my requirements. When I had driven around the parking lot, trying it on for size, he said he was buying it for me, and asked if we could have it that day.

The agent told us it would be delivered to my home within days, and so it was.

I tried it out in the apartment, laughing at my ineptitude at manoeuvring such a simple machine as a scooter in moves I had been making for 67 years in a car. Believe me, it is not the same! It should have been easy, but until you have tried to parallel park a scooter, don´t assume that it is as simple as it looks.

There is a straight steering bar, with a forward lever on the right and the reverse lever on the left. There is a control to set the desired speed - it goes all the way up to 8 mph! There are four wheels, the front two very close together, and when you push the steering bar one way or the other, the scooter turns immediately. It is much like riding a bicycle in that respect. Manoeuvring around furniture and backing and turning while trying to control the speed was challenging. It should be easy, but I was reduced to helpless laughter by the time I gave up the first time.

I have grave misgivings about going out in public on the scooter: because I can still walk - just not very far - I feel as if I am using it under false pretences. Jay kept asking if I had used it yet, and assured me that no-one would notice that I´m a hopelessly-handicapped senior. I finally asked my good friend Shirley if she would be willing to accompany me on a shopping expedition - I needed moral support. She readily agreed, and walked with me while I cautiously made my way around the many shoppers in Safeway one Sunday afternoon, and finally escorted me back to my apartment. We celebrated with a glass of wine.

Shirley even suggested we try it out somewhere else, so in the following week we went to a small restaurant with narrow spaces between the tables, and I managed to get in without banging into anyone. Getting out, backward, was not quite so easy, and I had a near miss with a woman I didn´t see, but that was the only incident. We then went shopping at two small stores, where I could not take the scooter inside because there was not room in the aisles if there were other shoppers, and Shirley volunteered to wait outside while I shopped. I think it would have been quite safe by itself, because once the key is withdrawn, the wheels will not turn and it is immobilized, but I was still nervous about leaving it. Shirley accompanied me home again, but this time refused a glass of wine on the grounds that she was going walking.

So far so good. But there it sat, snoozing, for a couple of weeks. Until Wednesday, when I had to make a longer trip and managed to get there and back without incident, except for wrestling with doors, which people sprang to open for me when they noticed me fumbling. After that, I went shopping, all by myself, and again managed without any problems. If I keep this up, I will soon be a seasoned scooter-rider and will think nothing of breezing uptown and back. I will have lots of company. You know how it is when you get a new silver car? You notice how many silver cars there are on the road. It´s the same with me - when I went out in my scooter, I noticed how many other people are using them around this area. I will have lots of company.

For anyone thinking of the possibility of widening their range by getting a scooter, I can only say, hang in there! Eventually we may even be as comfortable as we were for all those years in a car - and we don´t have to fill up with gas!

CORRESPONDENCE

Bill McNair writes: A few years ago I recall that beer had a content in it called "Agent Orange" and the beer barons would not say what it meant or contained. Household cleansers have no label telling what they contain here in Canada and we are warned not to mix these cleansers as they may have health risks and even cause death. Nothing is sacred today and anything goes!

We eat foods we do not even know what they contain or where they came from! That little tidbit came via a documentary by CBC not more than a couple months ago. Various fish, including salmon, grown or caught in China and retrieved from polluted waters, are sold here in Canada as a "Canadian Product". A very good idea is to carefully wash all fruit and veggies in soapy water and rinse again in clear clean water. We do.

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Verda Cook writes: I read with interest Kate Brookfield´s experience with the juice of an unknown fruit. When she identified it as screw pine I was keenly interested. Having been given such a plant to grow in our house, it was interesting to read about its natural habitat and the fact that it produces a fruit. So I went to my library and found background information on this plant, whose botanical name is pandanus tectorius. One of the common names given to this plant is tourist pineapple. The fruit apparently looks much like a pineapple.

My book states: "Fruit is eaten raw or cooked. The tree is prized for its fibre, found in its long leaves. Fibre is used in the South Pacific for weaving into a variety of items, from clothing to sails. The plant also has a few medicinal applications. Most commonly, the plant is grown as a lovely ornamental."

To be quite honest, I was not exactly thrilled with the plant and gave it away after a few years. Had I kept it, I´m sure it would never have produced fruit when grown in a pot, and with Kate´s description of it having a resin taste, I certainly would not waste space growing it for the idea of fruit.

For others who might be interested, my book states that this plant grows well in Florida and especially in the Keys. Anyone for a screw pine cocktail this winter?

Thanks, Kate, for introducing us to a world beyond our borders. Very interesting.

Barbara Wear forwards this obit by Mike Krumboltz:

THE DEATH OF THE SUV

Dearly beloved. We gather here today to mourn the demise of the sport utility vehicle, or "SUV" as its friends liked to call it.

The gas-guzzler lived a full life, driving in the fast lane from the 1990s to the early 2000s. Alas, it fell ill a few years ago and never recovered. And really, we can´t say the death came as a surprise. For years, folks complained about the environmental impact of low-mileage vehicles. Over time, those voices grew louder, but still the SUV fought on, proudly taking up two parking spaces and scaring hybrids from its lane.

But then, gas prices soared and the SUV´s vital signs plummeted. As much as people love large cars, the costs to keep fuel in the tank proved too much to take. As the New York Times reported, it now costs $100k to own and keep a similarly inefficient full-size pickup running for five years. And so people pulled the plug on their trucks and SUVs, taking the beleaguered vehicles off life support and into the museum of dead car fads.

U.S. News and World Report has written a thoughtful and compelling obit on the yuppie chariot. Read it and remember the SUV´s positive qualities as well as its faults. It´s what it would have wanted:

http://arunaurl.com/2f58

Jack Peaker reminds us that laughter was

THE LEGACY OF BOB HOPE

On turning 70 - "You still chase women, but only downhlll."

On turning 80 - "That´s the time of your life when even your birthday suit needs pressing."

On turning 90 - "You know you´re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake."

On turning 100 - "I don´t feel old. In fact, I don´t feel anything until noon. Then it´s time for my nap."

On giving up his early career, boxing - "I ruined my hands in the ring ... the referee kept stepping on them."

On never winning an Oscar - "Welcome to the Academy Awards, or as it´s called at my home, ´Passover´."

On golf - "Golf is my profession. Show business is just to pay the green fees."

On presidents - "I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six."

On why he chose showbiz for his career - "When I was born, the doctor said to my mother, ´Congratulations! You have an eight-pound ham.´"

On receiving the Congressional Gold Medal - "I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it."

On his family´s early poverty - "Four of us slept in one bed. When it got cold, mother threw on another brother."

On his six brothers - "That´s how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom."

On his early failures - "I would not have had anything to eat if it wasn´t for the stuff the audience threw at me."

On going to Heaven - "I´ve done benefits for ALL religions. I´d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality."

Don Henderson tells about

THE CONGREGATION´S DILEMMA

A preacher´s wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher´s family expanded, so would his paycheck.

After six children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher´s expanding salary.

A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued about how much the clergyman´s additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost. After listening to them for about an hour, the preacher rose from his chair and spoke, "Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us."

Silence fell on the congregation.

In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers."

The entire congregation said, "Amen."

RECOMMENDED WEBSITES

Bill McNair forwards the URL for a video of a Canadian girl addressing the United Nations:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Sb6RmRMbBY

Tom Telfer recommends the top 50 websites from Time magazine:

http://www.time.com/time/2006/50coolest/index.html

City Farmer recommends this website for videos of a family who turned their city lot into an urban homestead: http://youtube.com/user/dervaes

Since it was established in 1999, clickers on the Hunger Site have donated 573 million cups of food to starving people around the world. You can help by joining the thousands of people who click on the site every day: http://www.thehungersite.com/. And while you are there, why not click on its sister sites in aid of victims of breast cancer, the rain forests, animal rescue, literacy, and child health.

Go to http://www.environmentaldefence.ca/reports/tarsands.htmto read about "the most destructive project on earth," the tar sands project.

In modern war there is no such thing as victor and vanquished ... there is only a loser, and the loser is mankind. - U. Thant