Jim Cory

Jim Cory's latest chapbook, "Facts in the Case of E.A.P. (or) Low Road To Eldorado" will be published this month by Mooncalf Press. He lives in Philadelphia & can be reached at coryjim@earthlink.net.

37 x 1 x 3

About the uncles on my mother's side it was said that Red never drank a Drop & Arne never dropped a drink.

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Before 15, you rarely think of the consequences & after 45 you rarely
Think about anything except the consequences.

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If it serves no other useful purpose, the New Jersey Turnpike at least
Allows us a glimpse of eternity.

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Chris was so desperate to become famous he became famous for being desperate.

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Any conversation with her felt like the siege of Vicksburg.

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Days I think: people are horrible, & poets are the worst.

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Tanya Harding syndrome: all things come to she who skates.

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Reduce your cholesterol intake, the doctor warned, or go down to a
Buttery grave.

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In those days, Joseph was burning bridges that hadn't even been built yet.

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They met & instantly blonded.

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Into every new relationship Charles invariably brought more baggage than a wagon train.

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I warned Jack if he kept eating donuts by the bag he'd wake up one morning in the fat tank.

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What a difference a lay makes.

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David's birthday & the perennial conundrum: what to buy for the man who thinks he knows everything?

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A presumption is an assumption married to a premonition.

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Madonna: She set out to become a superstar & ended up just another black hole of culture.

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Elinor was a Big Mac in the world of McPoets.

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There is no mindset smaller than that which regards all things beyond New York City as provincial.

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He who hesitates is just plain stupid.

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The poems were like the man: chubby, self-important, & emblematic of all that is unnecessary.

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All-purpose eulogy: He had his faults, like all of us, & like all of us, was loathe to admit them.

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Save the Party Line for the party.

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At the gay gym, wearing the mind's sunglasses.

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These days it's so much easier to feel alone than be alone.

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Is it ennui or the growth of virtue which leaves me indifferent to the
Thrill of repeating gossip that is positively pheasant-under-glass?
Enui.

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We were all like putty in her paws.

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The person who broke into my house could at least have watered the plants.

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Ira attempted to commit suicide by throwing himself in front of a butterfly.

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That erection had my name written all over it.

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"Blue Moon" (short version): And then you felt sorry for me & we got into this horrible relationship.

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Sex with Vince was like dipping into a lunchmeat sundae.

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His middle name was Extravagance. And his first name & his last name.

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As happens every year, the company bonus went up in smoke & management
Blew the smoke right up our asses.

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The only thing which induces nausea more effectively than self-pity is self-congratulations.

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He liked to think of himself as an aristocrat though he was often visited
By delusions of squalor.

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Academic poetry is to literature what miniature golf is to sports.

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"If it's not one goddamn thing, it's another." Gayle Cory, 1923-2001,

RIP.

37 x 1 x 4

Exactly a year after her death, mother returned in a dream w/ the single question: "How's my car running?"

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Pleasant Way Books is pleased to announce the publication of Pasteurized Poetry, an anthology of the risk-free, maudlin & banal, 2,000 pages edited by the esteemed P.J. McFuckstick & sidekick Seymour Wheaty for review copies contact...

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Damn the pajamas, full speed ahead!

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Global warming = the human race asphyxiating itself in slow motion, using the Earth for a garage.

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Bernard was pain's ambassador & worry's alter ego.

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Famous last words: "I can control it."

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That human squirrel was cute & friendly, till you went to pet it.

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His 15 minutes lasted 15 seconds.

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I'm still trying to figure out where obsession ends & compulsion begins.

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Self-congratulation is the sincerest form of flattery.

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"Dying Inmate To Lawyer: 'You're Fired!'"

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It doesn't matter what you think of them or what they think of you. What matters is who you are, & who you are is how you act.

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People who think children are all sweetness & light obviously never had

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>From the NY Times obituary of composer Richard Rodgers: "Apart from the

occasional game of croquet, his only known diversion was listening by the hour to his own songs."

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Paranoia is a just a darker form of intuition.

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CNN Top Stories: "Shotgun Slaying Ends Heaven-or-Hell Argument."

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Japanese scientists are cloning a mammoth & plan to have a creature which is 88% mammoth in 50 years. Thank God I won't be here.

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Mrs. Whitman, on the subject of her son: "A good boy, but very strange."

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Never trust anyone who insists you can trust them.

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CNN, 9/22/02: "Mom: 'I'm Not A Monster.'"

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Art is the only thing I collect. Well, that & other people's underwear.

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Nothing colder than old celebrity.

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A career might begin, but should never end, on Hollywood Squares.

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You know what they say: The bigger the shed gets, the smaller the tools look.

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Aunt Dorothy, 92: "I got fired, once. I was glad!"

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My short term memory is such that I now forget things before they actually happen.

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I don't know if anxiety's causing my confusion, or confusion's fueling my anxiety, but in any event it's making me uneasy.

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Something there is that doesn't love a wallflower.

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"Click here for naked midgets!"

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On literary mentoring: Ernest not only bit the hand that fed him, he took the arm and shoulder off as well.

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CNN: 9/24/02: "Woman, 92, Given 30 Year Home Loan."

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Night of Thanksgiving. Christmas carols thru the neighbors wall so I turn the sound down low on the porn tape.

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Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my diet

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And now a bit of philosophy from Lubbock: "The great thing about being from West Texas is that when you go anywhere else, it's real special."

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Hercules cleaning the Augean stables: what a bunch of horseshit that must've been.

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I know it might've been coincidence but half the people at the Modigliani show looked like Modiglianis.

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>From the NY Times, Nov. 19, 2002: "In a study of residents of homes for the elderly conducted in the 1970s, Dr. Morton A. Lieberman, a psychologist now at the University of California at San Francisco, found that those who were ornery and argumentative with the nursing home staff members lived longer than those who were not."

Huzza!