Home  >> Stories  >> The Tale Spinner #2011-22

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IN THIS ISSUE

• Mike Yeager looks back at his path through life
• Jean Sterling enjoys a recommended video
• Pat Moore sends a story about parrots
• Catherine Nesbitt forwards some interesting but useless facts
• The editor fondly remembers a favourite dog
• Sites are suggested by Barbara Wear, Don Henderson, and Pat Moore

Mike Yeager posted the following essay on his blog, http://www.aretiredboomer.blogspot.com:

THE PATH OF LOVE

Mike & Cookie

When I was three years old, my dad found a puppy wandering alone on the railroad tracks and brought her home. It was around Christmas time, so he gave her to me on Christmas Eve as a present. I named her Cookie. She was my constant companion during the day and slept at the foot of my bed every night. She was loyal and taught me about unconditional love. As a young boy I remember lying in bed at night, Cookie pressed against my leg, and crying because I realized she would die before me.

Growing up, I lived as though my life would always safely contain my mom, dad, sister, and Cookie. We lived in the same house in Ferguson, Mo., from 1953 until 1965. From my perspective now, that doesn´t seem like a very long time, but those were my formative years, and so for the rest of my life that house on Moundale Drive will always feel like my true home.

Next door were the Howards, an elderly couple who never had children. When mom started working and I was in elementary school, Mrs. Howard took care of Cookie and me if I were sick or if there was no school for some reason. I loved my time with her. We developed a routine together. We watched television in the morning, three game shows in a row: The Price is Right with Bill Cullen, Truth or Consequences with Bob Barker, and Tic Tac Dough with Gene Rayburn. For lunch we often had chicken noodle or tomato soup and Braunschweiger on saltine crackers. She made her special sauce of catsup, mayonnaise, and I don´t know what else, to spread on the Braunschweiger. I always raved about it. She also had special treats for Cookie. I was the child she never had and I came with a nice little dog.

Missouri has crappy weather much of the year, but as a boy it didnt faze me. I loved being outside any time of the year, riding my bike, exploring Moline Creek, or just tromping around. My friends and I went to January-Wabash Park to swim in the public pool in the summer and ice-skated on the lake in the winter. And on the fourth of July, they put on a big fireworks display. My friend, Paul, lived nearby, and he was always eager to do something together. Its not easy being a kid and I had my struggles, but in general life was good and full of love and support.

By the time I got out of the army, everything had changed. Cookie died while I was in Vietnam. My mom didn´t tell me until I returned home. She felt I had had enough grief in the war and didn´t want to add to it. My heart had closed down in Vietnam for survival purposes. I had witnessed too much cruelty, death and suffering. I remember thinking when she told me about Cookies death, "You think Im going to get upset about a dog dying, after what I´ve been through?" I had no feelings at the time, even though my lifelong loyal companion was gone.

My parents moved to Kentucky, and so whenever I visited them, it was in a strange city where I didn´t know a soul. The Howards had moved back to Decatur, Illinois. I never saw Mrs. Howard again. Sometime in the ´70s I got a letter from Mr. Howard telling me she had died. He had enclosed a photograph of her headstone. Paul was away at college and we could only see each other rarely. The life I counted on for those 12 years was gone.

But I carried the essence of my childhood with me as my life unfolded. I had internalized those values learned in the 50s growing up in Ferguson. I had other pets, each one unique, and each one responding to the love and loyalty that Cookie taught me. I knew how to give and receive love in a family, because I learned that from my parents and my sister. I also knew how to be a supportive loyal friend, because of my lifelong relationship with Paul.

It took me two tries to find the right partner, but practice makes perfect. When I met Katie I knew right away that she was the one. There is nothing better than sharing your life with a person to whom you give your heart completely. When our son Ben was born, my heart was ripped wide open. When he died at age 28, I would have given my life in exchange for his without a moment´s hesitation.

My path is the path of love. Love is the purest and most satisfying of human emotions and sometimes it hurts like hell.

CORRESPONDENCE

Jean Sterling writes: What a wonderful video suggested by Bob Wiggins, "the greatest anti-retirement video of all time"! (http://www.garynorth.com/public/6791.cfm)

Mayor Hazel McCallion is an inspiration. Most women her age couldn´t even pick up a bowling ball, much less get a split like she did. Not only is she active, she runs a city with no debt!

The part where she put on her hockey skates reminded me of a story involving Abby´s (Abby is the dog Jean received from a snowbird) former owner, who hails from Orillia, Ontario. She told me that she has a cell phone (a gift from her son, I believe) and that her ring tone plays "Hockey Saturday Night". She said the phone started ringing (loudly) when she was in a doctor´s waiting room and created quite a stir.

Pat Moore forwards the story of

THE CATHOLIC PARROTS

A woman went to her priest one day and told him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots but they only know to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest asked.

They say, "Hi, we´re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

"That´s obscene!" the priest exclaimed.

Then he thought for a moment.... "You know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we´ll put them in the cage with Francis and Peter.

"My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying - that phrase - in no time."

"Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution."

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest´s house.

As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying.

Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.

After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison:

"Hi, we´re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

There was stunned silence....

Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other parrot and said,

"Put the beads away, Frank. Our prayers have been answered!"

Catherine Nesbitt forwards these

USELESS BUT INTERESTING FACTS

If you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on the right side of your mouth. If you are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on the left side of your mouth.

To make half a kilo of honey, bees must collect nectar from over two million individual flowers.

Heroin is the brand name of morphine once marketed by Bayer.

Tourists visiting Iceland should know that tipping at a restaurant is considered an insult!

People in nudist colonies play volleyball more than any other sport.

Albert Einstein was offered the presidency of Israel in 1952, but he declined.

Astronauts can´t belch - there is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in their stomachs.

The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows. In the Renaissance era, it was fashion to shave them off.

Because of the speed at which Earth moves around the sun, it is impossible for a solar eclipse to last more than seven minutes and 58 seconds.

The night of January 20 is "Saint Agnes´s Eve", which is regarded as a time when a young woman dreams of her future husband.

Google is actually the common name for a number with a million zeros.

It takes glass one million years to decompose, which means it never wears out and can be recycled an infinite amount of times.

Gold is the only metal that doesn´t rust, even if it´s buried in the ground for thousands of years.

Your tongue is the only muscle in your body that is attached at only one end.

If you stop getting thirsty, you need to drink more water. When a human body is dehydrated, its thirst mechanism shuts off.

Each year 2,000,000 smokers either quit smoking or die of tobacco- related diseases.

Zero is the only number that cannot be represented by Roman numerals.

Kites were used in the American Civil War to deliver letters and newspapers.

The song, Auld Lang Syne, is sung at the stroke of midnight in almost every English-speaking country in the world to bring in the new year.

Drinking water after eating reduces the acid in your mouth by 61 percent.

ED. NOTE: No claims are made for the accuracy of these "facts". I checked the statement that bananas cannot reproduce without the help of man, and it turned out to be partly true: domesticated bananas indeed need help, but wild bananas produce large seeds and are self propagating.

Mike Yeager´s story about Cookie reminded me of my little golden cocker spaniel,

FLUFF

Fluff never knew she was a dog.

When she was very young, she was adopted by an elderly woman, who treated her like a person. She grew up thinking she was a little old lady too, which led to some problems when she came to live with us.

When we first met Fluff, she was living in a home overrun by animal fugitives from indifference and cruelty, and she was not happy being confined with all those animals. The home belonged to a postman, who always carried treats for the dogs he met on his route, and with his wife, rescued animals from various situations. They got Fluff from the SPCA, where she had been sent by a welfare agency when her owner died. At the age of five, she was considered too old for adoption, and if it had not been for the intervention of the postman, she would have been disposed of.

As soon as we entered the room teeming with dogs and cats, Fluff jumped up on a chair and addressed us directly. There was no doubt about her meaning, and we let her persuade us to remove her from those uncongenial surroundings.

She settled in happily at home, and in a short time she had us trained to feed her, open doors, take her for walks and rides in the car. She sat on the chesterfield and chairs, and it was only after several serious discussions she abandoned her intention of sleeping on my bed.

When we first got her, she was afraid of Jay, as she was of all men. She may have learned this from her first owner, who may have been equally distrustful of men. It took some time for her to become accustomed to Jay, but in a short time she became as fond of him as she was of me and my mother, who lived with us then.

She practised a form of blackmail on me that always left me feeling guilty. When it was obvious I was getting ready to leave, she cavorted around with little cries of delight that she was going to be allowed to accompany me. When I made it obvious that she couldn´t come this time, she subsided into a little lump of misery, giving me to understand that I had broken her heart.

When I returned, she would jump up on a chair to talk to me on my own level and then she´d tell me about what sort of a day she had had. As long as I kept on answering her, she would keep on "talking."

When I took her for a trim, they would give her a puppy cut, which made her look very young, even when she passed into her teens. We were out walking after one of these cuts, and some people who stopped to pet her told me she would be a big dog when she grew up!

But alas, as Mike realized when he was very young, animals do not live as long as their fond owners, and when she was about 15, she developed severe arthritis, which made it painful for her to go up and down the many stairs in our house, and she was mercifully released from her suffering.

Now, as you know, I have a cat, who is as different from Fluff as it is possible to be, but who also makes me laugh and keeps me company. There are times, like Happy´s jumping on my knee while I´m trying to type, that I am not laughing, but for all that, I would not be without him.

I´m sure that many of you have stories of beloved pets, so why not take a few minutes to tell us about them? If you have pictures of them, so much the better. I have pictures of Fluff, but they are in albums somewhere and have never been scanned. I do have a digital picture of Happy, however, which you see here in a "Clickable" form.

SUGGESTED SITES

Barbara Wear sends this link to a panoramic view of Puebloan granaries. Click on the picture, then move your mouse around for a 360-degree view. There are other panoramic videos available in the lower right-hand corner or the screen.

Don Henderson found this Russian reporter´s reaction to the story of the bears and the marijuana hilarious. It is a true story, but unfortunately the bears had become so used to humans that they could not be returned to the wild:

Pat Moore sends this link to a video of a real cat burglar:

Pat also forwards this animated film about a rookie secret agent faced with a problem seldom covered in basic training: what to do when a curious pigeon gets trapped inside your multi-million dollar, government-issued nuclear briefcase:

Bees are dying in droves. Why? Leading apiarist Dennis vanEngelsdorp looks at the bees´ important place in nature and the mystery behind their alarming disappearance:

John Hunter puts all the problems of the world on a 4´x5´ plywood board - and lets his 4th-graders solve them. At TED2011, he explains how his World Peace Game engages schoolkids, and why the complex lessons it teaches - spontaneous, and always surprising - go further than classroom lectures can:

To check out the features of the "freedictionary", which changes daily, go to

http://members.shaw.ca/vjjsansum/freedictionarytestpageV2.html