• Laughing at my bad habits.

• Hiking without the ten essentials.

• Garage Sailing or saleing depending on what spell-checker from Microserf you are using.

• Using a friend's scanner to listen to my neighbor's steamy conversations with their lovers on unsecure cellular and cordless telephones. And trying not to smirk when I pass them on the street knowing what I now know. I guess it is true. Inquiring minds do want to know.

• Standing on a street corner, smiling like a good worker robot, wearing my best grey Hickey-Freeman suit (from corporate welfare receiving "We need a 23 million dollar parking garage" Nordstrom's, of course) with a sign which reads:
  

  Corporate down-sized from Starbuck$.
                  Will work for lattés.

• Encouraging my Macintosh friends to steal their PC based friend's "Intel Inside" logo from their Pentium computers and put the logo underneath the flush handle of their home toilet. BTW, I use Windblow 98, Internet Exploder, and Netscrape.

• Sending out identical résumés for pink color (girl jobs) positions (administrative assistant) with the names "Kay Gorman" and my real name to see who would get called.

  Answer: Kay: 6, Keith: 2 out of ten (10) of each sent randomly to advertisers in the Sunday Edition of the Seattle Times. It's nice to know that discrimination has been outlawed.

• Cat juggling (with thick leather gloves).

• Meeting potential rabbit-killers (remember Fatal Attraction?) by placing personal ads.

• Clothing optional swims on every other Saturday night at the Northgate Athletic Club from October to May.

• Cross-dressing my Venus (Miss Goddess of Love) and David refrigerator magnets.

• Exploiting "low-income" coffee farmers in Latin America by drinking Starbuck$ coffee.

• Reading the obituaries in the Seattle Times and the Seattle Post-Intelligencer to see if my *"evil" former mother-in-law has died (so I can cheer and dance the hora (an Israeli dance), smile).
  * You have to have been married before to appreciate this humor.

• Reminding people not to believe what they read in the newspaper, who's who books, Inc. 500 and other business listings based on my own experiences.

• Visiting Scenic Hot Springs in the West Cascades and Olympic Hot Springs on the Olympic Peninsula in Washington State and Cougar/Terwiller Hot Springs with Seven Cascading Pools East of Eugene, Oregon.

• Landscape and Nature Photography.

• Gold Mining in the Cascades with the slightly right-wing Washington Gold Prospectors Association.

• Restoring Ravenna Creek to a natural waterway.

• Watching the racoon and opposum families wander through my back yard at dusk.

• Living simply by using Entertainment® 2-for-1 and 50% off dining out and other coupons, taking the bus, using the library, carpooling (and paying for the gas since the driver is providing the vehicle), going out on picnic/potluck dates, living in less space, and going to garage sales, etc.

• Trying to figure out my managed (I call it mangled) care health plan.

• Listening to the Mazeltones in concert.

• Visiting the Frye Art Museum and seeing their European Landscape Collection.