in three words:

In an oblique manner, the people who talk about "covenant marriage" are right. Marriage is something which enforces what should be a relationship. If the relationship is valid, it will be self-bonding.

Women's Issues

The ideal of marriage requires that both parties adjust to each others' life. That either means that one party dominate the other or the parties manipulate each other to make things "fit." You cannot be an individual with your own life if your life is really someone else's.

Marriage is an artifact of an age in which women were essentially slaves to their men. Perhaps well-treated, but still subservient. Granted that there were economic reasons to do so, but that doesn't change the end result. Marriage remains an agreement to servitude.

What About Kids?

One of the arguments for marriage is that it's the best thing for the kids? Is it? Heh, if you think you're Mr & Mrs. Cleaver, then you'll stay together and make a great couple. You don't need a marriage license to do that.

1. Be responsible and be prepared to share the responsibilities of child rearing.
2. If you get married and then get divorced, you'll have to make arrangements; only this time as an aftermath to a divorce. Like, is that better?

The Last One Was a Just a Mistake

So don't make the same mistake again. Don't make a lesser mistake again. Don't even make a very small mistake again -- it ain't worth it.

I Love Her/Him/It

Then don't ruin it with the aftermath of a beautiful ceremony. Marriage means sacrifice, so don't sacrifice your lover to a dream which has a 60% failure rate. Sure there are happily married couples, but wouldn't they also be happily unmarried?

Isn't Marriage the Moral Thing

Right. You get married, find you don't get on, and then you are either in a bad marriage or a good divorce. Live your life according to your beliefs, ritual, or faith. There are plenty of ways to demonstrate that.

Look at those Hamas people who blow themselves up as terrorists to gain their heavenly reward. At least those guys accomplish something with their sacrifice (if you consider killing innocent people accomplishing something). I'm not saying that marriage harms others, at least not in the sense of terrorism. But think of the logic of those Hamas people.

Some People are Meant for Marriage

If you're over 24, or over 15 in Arkansas, and not already happily married Come close to the screen for this one... YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO ARE "MEANT FOR MARRIAGE." If you believe you will be different, that just proves YOU ARE IN LOVE, AND NOT EXERCISING SOUND JUDGEMENT.

(If you come from one of those places where people marry early, beware! Do not get married at 16, 18, 20 or 22 just because people from your hometown are doing it.)

Just accept you are in love with the perfect person. If you believe you will be happy living together forever, no problem. If you really believe that schidt, what good will a marriage certificate do?

Same-Gender Marriages

We've got a whole page! www.scn.org/~bk269/same.html