Are you available to work this weekend?
What kind of cereal did you buy?
Answer varies. (In my household, when it comes to cereal, Mom buys the staples -- Corn Flakes, Mini-Wheats and Cheerios -- but Dad also buys a box for himself (and the kids, natch). Sometimes it's sweetened ("yay!") but occasionally it's something healthier ("I think I'll just have some mini-wheats"))
Do you want a club card?
No, thank you. (I do not want another piece of plastic in my wallet, just so I can participate in your dumb marketing plan. If you really want my regular business that bad, build a store in my neighborhood.)
Got any spare change?
Answer varies:
No. (When I'm in a hurry, feeling selfish and/or don't trust the person asking the question.)(I actually don't get asked this question near as much as I think I do.)
What do want it for? (When I'm actually doing my job as my brother's keeper. This is the best way to actuallyhelp , but sometimes I wonder if I'm actually doing any good.)
Uh, yeah. Here. (When I'm in a hurry and don't really want to help but my conscience needs soothing.)
Are you available to work this weekend?
Uh, let me ask my wife. (That's a silly answer. You know she'll say no, unless we just dipped into the bank account to make a major purchase.)
updated 1/7/2001